Tribute to Nancy Fossey of Nottingham. Address given at Mapperley Methodist Church, by the Revd. Dr.David Monkton. Supernumerary Minister.
Nancy was born on the 25th November 1935 in Swanwick Derbyshire. She went to the local primary school and passed her eleven plus exam to enable her to go to Swanwick Hall Grammar School where she completed her school certificate in six subjects.
After leaving school at sixteen she went to work in the fashions department at the Co-operative store on Parliament Street in Nottingham. This was where Bert met Nancy and their romance started when they were both selected to take part in the Co-op's Fashion Parades which were held at the Embassy Ballroom Skegness.
Sometime later Nancy left the Co-op and worked for Boots in the invoice office. There she met Madge O'Reilly and Sheila East who have been special friends ever since. Many other strong friendships over the years have been formed. In her younger days Nancy was very active in the Methodist Church at Swanwick, and taught in the Sunday School there. Bert and Nancy were married at this church in March 1956 by the Revd. Victor Pilot,(well-known to Bert and Nancy as a table tennis player.) Jane was born in 1959. They moved from Bulwell to Sherwood Vale in June 1960 and David was born in 1962.
There was a very wide network of people that she knew and kept good contact with especially in the Sherwood Vale area. There were her colleagues who worked with her in the library where she had worked part-time for 25 years. She also helped in the City hospital WRVS. Shop for some six or seven years.
She was fond of her embroidery, of reading and a regular visitor to the theatre She has taken a great interest in recent years in her grand children and more recently the arrival of a great grand child.
Since retirement Bert and Nancy have enjoyed together many holidays - having visited Andorra, Egypt, Canada, Cyprus Austria and many other places, but they have especially enjoyed the holidays that Laurie Oliver organised -to the Passion Play at Oberammergau, the visit to Russia and the Canada and Alaska Cruise.
Around about this time last year, Bert and Nancy came with Pauline and I to the Shetland Isles, where the people made us all so welcome both in the churches and in the community.
Bert and Nancy transferred their membership from Bulwell, to Mapperley Methodist Church 48 years ago. The church meant a great deal to her. She was a traditionalist who had a strong preference for older styles of worship. On the face of it, you would not call her a leader: she was not an up-front person, but she was very good at relating to people on a 'one to one' basis. She was often involved with the distribution of the church flowers after Sunday worship. She was in fact very fond of flowers, both wild and cultivated and regularly received flowers from Bert, not only on special occasions.Nancy didn't like to see flowers wasted, and that is the reason they have been brought here today from the committal service- to be given to other people who will appreciate them.
Something very poignant about flowers happened to Bert a few days ago when he went through letters that Nancy sent him in the early days of their romance. Nancy went away to Skegness on holiday in 1954 - that's fifty four years ago now. In one of the letters she sent to him on holiday Bert found that she had also sent him a forget-me-not flower. Finding this flower speaks very movingly to Bert today.
In the last few years she had attended the Thursday IBRA fellowship. One of the things I noticed especially was how deeply she felt about the suffering of other people. In many ways Nancy was a private person but also a very loving and caring person to others who needed this special care. She looked for the best in others.
Bert writes, in the notes he gave me as background for this message today these words:
Both of us have enjoyed the fellowship here, and my thoughts flood with all the happy times too numerous to mention. This is the place where the love of God reigns and the evidence for this is abundantly clear over these past weeks. Thank you God for the life of Nancy, my beloved wife.' There's very little that I feel I want to say after Bert's tribute to Nancy, but there is one thing that I think is very important, and it's this.
All of us here today have some sense of being on life's pilgrimage with Nancy.
Perhaps this idea of pilgrimage comes out to some of us most strongly when we remember our visits to Oberammergau, to see the Passion Play, and may be on the visit to Russia; which enabled us to see faith in Christ from a very different perspective in Russian Churches.
Pilgrims also help each other along on the way. That is an important aspect of our role in life. We are to help each other to travel on that journey. There is to be a mutual giving and receiving along this way. This I know has been the case with Nancy. Her life has made our lives so much richer and we are all going to miss her in so many different ways.
We are all numbed and distressed at Nancy's death, but there is a sense in which we have to see death as a pause on a journey. Holy Scripture reminds us that 'here we have no abiding city. here we have no fixed resting-place but we seek after the city which is to come.' (Hebrews 13;14.)
So we all fix our hopes in God, who is the one who brings us together again in eternity.
It is in this resurrection hope that we put our trust. Through Jesus Christ Our Lord. Amen.
.
Singing was one of her main joys. She belonged to the music society in Lincoln and was especially fond of singing in the choir that often performed in the Cathedral. She was also in the choir at our West Parade Church.
For many years she was Captain of the Girls Brigade, and jointly worked with others in running the Sunday School. There were many other activities and responsibilities that she undertook in the church's life.
She showed great loyalty and support to Pauline and myself and the church when the church was going through very difficult days.
With her parents she has belonged to that kind of family whose lives were deeply centred around so much that went on in the church - without which it was impossible for neighbourhood churches to exist. She was very close to her father too who was also loyally committed to many leadership roles at West Parade.
Since the closure of West Parade she has given good support, as she has been able, to the Church at Bailgate.
We have always known her as a good friend who was always willing to help in all kinds of ways. She baby sat for us when we were here.
Wherever we have been she has visited us, including a special service held at St. Albans when we retired.
She came to see us several times when we lived in the Shetland Isles and particularly enjoyed coming to visited us in the darkest depths of winter to see Uphellyaa, the Viking Festival.
Whilst she was visiting us there, our youngest daughter recalls Margaret typing out for her some sixth form studies that she had to do. We'd just had a new kitten at that time who decided to take an interest in Margaret's typing.. Every time the typewriter carriage shot across the page, the cats' paws pounced out at it. It slowed up the typing considerably, but it is a reminder of things that were the essence of laughter and humour for Margaret.
She took an interest in flowers and gardens, in embroidery, and in recent times designed decoupage cards and sent them to friends.
She was very fond of children, and related to them well. There are many parents here today who are thankful for the care and interest she took in their children, not only in the Girls Brigade and the Sunday School, but often taking on very mundane tasks for their welfare in times of special need.
She was godmother to many children too. One has come here today all the way from America to give thanks for her life, and others have travelled a considerable distance to be here today.
Since her thirties, she has bravely battled with illness. During the time we were here in Lincoln, she lost her voice. For six months she was unable to speak. This was a terrible blow to her because as well as being unable to converse with other people, she especially missed her singing. She had a beautiful singing voice.
On several occasions bouts of illness meant she had to be off work - and at other times she was only able to work for limited spans of time, often at home; and more recently of course she was diagnosed as having cancer. Although there have been times when she found it hard to accept these things, this is not the lasting impression that is left in our minds. She continued to be positive in her outlook. She was very appreciative of the support and prayers of all her friends.
Over the years however she has given strong support to her friends, and the loyalty of her friendship, has been appreciated by us all. Whenever she has asked how we are, there has always been a mention by name of the children too, and a following out in detail of what they were doing. I am sure this was the experience of all who knew her.
There are many pictures of Margaret around the house at 45 West |Parade, together with pictures of friends, and children she has taken a special interest in. The one I think that epitomises her life is one of her taken in the kitchen at the West Parade Church, serving out ploughman's lunches. There is that cheeky smile on her face, and you can see that sense of humour there too. We will always remember her cheeky chuckle.
The Psalm that was chosen to be read today, Psalm 121, also has something important to say to us at this time, as we come to support you Freda in this time of your great loss and ours.
It is a great Psalm that reminds us that although we may not always be aware of God being at work, he is always active in his world and especially in our lives, even in the most difficult of days. God is the ground of our being, God is the very means of our existence and our nurture. Israel of old could put their trust in God as a faithful creator, and we, too, like Israel, can put our trust in him as well.
As we give thanks for Margaret's life, appreciating all the good things she stood for we do so in resurrection hope believing that her trust in Christ will lead her through to eternal life. Amen.
Tribute to Peter Rider
He began his building apprenticeship at Appleby's on Castle Boulevard, and was later employed by Nottingham City Council as building Control Officer until his retirement in 1997.
This wasn't the end of his involvement in this kind of work however. He was in great demand for his building planning skills - both in the community and in the church, or rather I should say churches. He was widely consulted on property matters in the Methodist District and beyond.
Peter and Hazel married in 1958 at All Saints Parish Church in Raleigh Street, although neither of them were Anglicans. Peter belonged to a strong Methodist Family that attended Independent Street Methodist Church, and the family were the mainstays of that church. Peter, I suspect had inherited his strong lay tradition of being involved in church life from his parents. Hazel had been brought up to attend the local Congregational Church.
How did they meet? Well apparently Hazel worked in the Inland Revenue in Milton Street, when major property alterations were taking place there and Peter was working as a joiner. That's where the attraction began - seeing Peter coming up and down on a ladder!
They found they had a common interest in Scouting and Guiding. Hazel has never forgotten the second time they went out. It was the 29th of November. They went to the pictures at the Mechanics Institute, and when they came out the ground was covered deep in snow. From then onwards things continued on a really 'firm footing'.
Family-wise, Jonathan was first on the scene, followed by David, They had a good settled family life and in earlier years they frequently visited Cornwall for their holidays. Later Peter and Hazel visited Spain and the Greek Islands, a very memorable visit to the Holy Land, and more recently - even this year- holidays in France.
. As a memento for his 70th birthday, the family brought him a digital camera. This opened up a new photographic era in his life, and it meant a great deal to him. There were times during the latter part of his illness when he was not able to communicate very clearly, but one thing as was mentioned earlier that came over clearly was that he hoped his digital camera was safe!
Peter has served the church in many different ways over the years: as a property steward, lettings secretary, and as a representative of our church on the Mapperley Council of Churches. He was on the management committee at Noel Street, Forest Fields, Hyson Green, for many years. He was in recent times often on duty with Hazel as a door steward for funerals.
He was deeply involved in the publicity of the Church. He felt it was important that the Church notice boards should be kept up to date and relevant. He had always said, he didn't want to have anything to do with computers, but when Jonathan became interested in them, he became deeply involved himself and has used his computer as a great tool in the service of the church. Many photographs of church life here at Mapperley appeared in the Methodist Recorder via Peter's computer!
He also took on the responsibility of preparing the Circuit plan for publication.
Peter and I on one occasion went for a day Conference to Milton Keynes to learn all about relating Church activities to web-sites. The way never opened up for this to happen at the time, but this is certainly something that is still to be.
He had some distinctive ideas of what he wanted to present as eye catching phrases for the church's 'public pulpit' notice board. He was not afraid to take us into new areas of untried activities, and he used me at times as a sounding board for his ideas..
One such scheme was 'the last mince pie' evenings - a social evening to mark the end of Christmas celebrations. When there were more bookings from outside organisations, this was marked with a good measure of success because it helped the church to relate to the community using the premises.
We have thought of Peter as being the official Church photographer and newsgatherer - recording many special events in the life of the church. Many of the photographs appeared on the church notice board and in the church notices. When a party of us went to China, Peter ensured that we sent him an email of up-to -date news - in time to put in the church notices, as it were 'from our own correspondent!'
Even in recent weeks he was keen for us to do a photograph a month with a caption on it. The first one's title really summed up what it was all about and the Christian thought behind it. To accompany a photograph of the new school at Mapperley Plains Primary School we used the words of George Herbert, the hymn-writer - 'teach me my God and King, in all things thee to see.'
He saw the importance of learning and informing through things that we see, as well as the spoken word, and the great importance of the church using modern media sensibly and according to the age in which we live. He was quite passionately concerned about this.
The second 'photograph a month' was of garden produce grown at Blue Bell Hill Primary School. This photograph provided a focal point for our Harvest Festival, and at the Blue Bell Hill School harvest too. This reminds us of how much his photographs linked us as a church to all kinds of people and all kinds of situations.
What about Peter as a person?
I believe that Peter had qualities found in the disciple Peter - true to his name he was rock like, firm, rugged and sometimes unmoveable. He held strong opinions too on many things, but he was also a person with a strong sense of loyalties.
He was a strong supporter of the People's College Old Boys Association, and he has served as their treasurer in recent years. At the annual Reunion Dinner, which incidentally took place this last week-end, (with some 70 other old students) he was known for his rousing renditions of the College song. According to his sister, I am told, it was the only time they heard him really sing!
He was loyal to family ties - keeping in contact with cousins and other relatives over several generations.
In recent days he shared with some of us his feelings about dying. When he had major surgery he felt that the Lord was with him. This experience of assurance meant a great deal to him and he shared this with others. Although he didn't want to be named in public prayers, he was nevertheless deeply appreciative of all the prayerful support that the church and friends had given him.
He said he would have liked to have lived a bit longer, but he was grateful for the three score years and ten he had been given. He was thankful that he had been able to enjoy life, and showed real serenity of faith in his time of testing.
The Chairman of the District, the Revd. Wesley Blakey writes:
''I speak on behalf of all when I say that we are grateful not only for what Peter did, but also for the man that he was - generous, willing, thorough, loyal - a truly good man for whom we thank God.'
To Hazel, Jonathan and June David and Diane and the grandchildren Natasha, John-Luke and Darren: to Peter's sister Susan and Adrian her husband and to Hazel's sister Marylin and her husband Bill and their families, we all want to express to you our prayerful support at this time of your sad loss; but we also thank God for his life, his faith and continued trust in Christ, and all that he has shared with others.
. Address given by the Revd.Dr.David Monkton at Bramcote Crematorium on the the 16th of March 2006, to give thanks for the life of Joan Oliver of Woodthorpe, Nottingham.
Joan Oliver
Today we meet to give thanks for the life of Joan Oliver. Her life began in humble circumstances. Her father worked as a stocking salesman, visiting many of the market towns of the East Midlands. Her mother ran a shop in Nottingham selling furs.Because of the limited facilities at the Wheeler-Gate fur shop She lived with an Aunt and another family member for a period, but she went to a good school in the Park and later went to the Girl's High School in Nottingham.Unfortunately during the time there Joan was knocked down in a road accident. She was depressed for a considerable period following this and also lost her sense of smell.
Brian's first awareness of her was when they were both about ten years of age, in what seemed almost like a 'love at first sight' experience. At that time Joan used to stay with her parents at their bungalow near Trent lock. On one occasion when Brian and his brother John were staying at their family week-end hut they rowed down the river. Who should they see in a small boat with her own name painted on it but Joan. It left a lasting impression- one that was to be followed up, by Brian, in later years.
The start of the relationship however began through a common interest in reading after Brian borrowed one of her Swallows and Amazons books. The friendship developed in sharing things like reading, walking and playing tennis.
She was very much the apple of her father's eye. Her father however put a stop to the relationship for a time because of one of Brian's escapades. He had foolishly taken her trespassing into a railway tunnel- into a safety alcove- to sense the suction impact of a train passing through the tunnel. When her father heard about this he banned Brian from seeing her again. It was a considerable time later, after her mother's intervention, that her father relented, and let them meet together again.
On leaving school she went to the college of art gaining her city and guilds in dress design. It was whilst she was at art college that her interest in painting grew, although the knowledge she gained did not come from the course itself but from friends there who were keen artists.During the war she became a dispenser at Boots.
Brian whilst on leave from his military service in Italy married Joan on the 7th of February 1946. February this year was their Diamond wedding anniversary - a day that was simply remembered, in a very quiet way because of Joan's illness. We also remember just now that today would have been her 83rd birthday.
The marriage has been characterised by extreme closeness, mutual support co-operation and trust - a trust which was well tested by four years separation during the war. There has always been a sharing of everything- a deep love which someone described as being like two halves to an apple.
There have been three areas where this has especially applied.
In the early stages she showed tremendous patience with Brian in his work and extra studies he had to fulfil. With the ensuing mergers in partnerships that followed in the Civil engineering world. Joan was admired by many of Brian's colleagues as a great conversationalist who was completely at home sharing in the details of the jobs that they were doing together.
Secondly there has been her talent as an artist in oils. Looking round their home you cannot but be impressed especially by the painting of various kinds of flowers in oils. Brian and Joan often painted in their studio together - on some occasions even making joint contributions to a particular canvass. She delighted too in possessing the paintings painted and carvings created by friends.
Thirdly there has been her avid reading of books. The way in which they have discussed the many books that they have read together, and there are the careful notes and records that have been kept of the books that have been read.
One of the characteristics of Villiers Road has been to see Brian and Joan reading together as one has walked by - one at one end of the window as it were, and one at the other. Occasionally it would be the newspaper they were reading, but more often than not a book. There was an amazingly catholic taste in reading from Mauve Binchy on the one hand to historical novels based on fact on the other. They have always found book shops and book fairs difficult to resist. One of the last rituals of the day would often be for Brian to read an extract from a book they had been reading together before retiring to sleep. In the earlier years it had been a sharing of Arthur Ransome's books together. In more recent years the Discworld Books of Terry Pratchett whose sense of humour appealed to them both.
Whenever Joan was out in the garden or in the road she was keen to make friends with all whom she met, whether it was the postman or a neighbour, like myself, just passing by. This capacity for making friends had been a characteristic all through her life, and I know that both Brian and Joan have been very appreciative of all the loving and practical support that neighbours have given especially during the last few months of her illness and for the medical attention she has received.
Let us now give thanks to God for Joan's life - as family and friends, as neighbours, as those who have known her over many years- remembering her artistic gifts, her avid interest in books, her sparkle and her keenness to make friendships with all whom she met.
.
.
Address given at the service of thanksgiving for 'Jock' Dunlop (William Dunlop) at the United Church, Fairford, by the Revd. David Monkton on the 6th July 2004.a/o request
Tribute at at the Funeral of Celitha Alice Stapleton at Marlborough Road Methodist Church on Friday 14th June 2002. a/o.request. A tribute to Bill Charlesworth, a/o/request
A tribute to Barbara Northend - available on request.